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hey guys welcome back to my channel today I am doing a 5 tips for new moms this is a collaboration video with my friend Katie here on YouTube I will have her channel links down below she does terms of mommy videos cleaning videos she's starting to vlog more I just absolutely love her and if you are new here from Katie's video my name is Melissa I have a two-year-old son who is over there playing with toys and I have a one month old son who's sitting here grunting so this is just real life mommy moments oh yeah you're gonna hear lots of noise in the background but let's just jump right into this week's video my tip number one is something that I am trying to follow myself right now and that is to pick your battles sorry he's grunting a lot so he's just going to join me in using the phrase pick your battles could really mean so many different things for example I have tried to film this video at least five times in the past five minutes I'm having to keep on starting over because my two-year-old just keeps on talking over me and he had to go the bathroom he keeps showing me his toys and I need to tell myself he's to like don't try and make him be quiet you know pick your battles do I want this video to be a hundred percent perfect and quiet and trying to show you know that mommy life is not stressful no I don't want to do that so I'm picking my battles and doing something that makes me happy and him happy at the same time long story short it asked ins not destroying anything if he's not harming himself or harming others I try and just let it go I try not stress over it because that stress is just gonna upset me more it's gonna ruin the day and it's not worth it oh I see so yeah it's just pick your battles I'm not trying to be a pushover but my sanity means more than telling him no 100 million times a day even though I still do but you know what I mean I try not stress over it number two don't let people bring you down this is also something very broad and you could use it in many different circumstances but how I do it is when people try and offer me advice sometimes I get upset and it really it brings down my mood so I try and take what people say with a grain of salt and just still do what I want because you know moms could be very mean and she had some judgmental family could be judgmental even if they trying like they're trying not to be it comes off judgmental so I try not let what others think what their opinions are you know how they you know if they critique my parenting I try not let it bring me down because I know I know my boys love me I know I'm a good mom and that's all that matters number three accept help or ask for help when you need it this is something I really struggled with with my first I didn't want to accept any help I wanted to feel like the supermom who could do it all which honestly I don't think there's one mom who could really just do it all if there is please teach me your ways coz I just get too overwhelmed but now I accept help and I ask for help all the time if I need it it just makes me a happier person because I'm not stressed all the time and in return it makes my kids right here because I'm not a Reno brunch all the time and number four don't be too hard on yourself this is also something I learned more with my second then with my first but I was really hard on myself as a first-time mom like I said I just wanted to do it all myself even though it's very unrealistic to get everything perfect when you're the only one doing it if you hold yourself up to too high of a standard you're never going to feel good enough you're never going to feel like you're good enough mom which is not the case you're always going to be good enough to your children as long as you love them that's all I need your kids don't care how clean your kitchen is or how clean the living room is or if their toys get picked up at night they don't care about that what they care about is that you were there for them to give them hugs and kisses when they needed it and that's all that matters number five is probably my biggest tip and that is to find yourself a mom tribe now that doesn't mean you have to have a big group of mom friends who all hangs out together every Tuesday 14e or whatever it is but just mom's like you could vent to and talk to ask their opinion or just some moms to calm you down I do think it should be moms though because they understand what you're going through for example Katie isn't who those moms could I go to all the time just to vent to my friend Maggie she's also here on YouTube I'll have her channel link down below she has been one of my very good friends for the past two years which has blows my mind but you know we talk to each other all the time and just vent to each other and we really I feel like we really helped each other through the hard times and she's actually the one who introduced me to Katie so thank you Maggie just having moms that you could talk to really helps not only you get like advice but just someone who understands what it's like being a mom I just don't understand this video was supposed to be more planned out man I like how to own my phone I was all ready to go but you know I'm picking my battles because he did not want an app but I wanted to make this video so this is what happened I hope you guys enjoyed today's video like I said please go check out KB's channel it would mean so much to me if you did and if you're new please consider subscribing I'd love to have you here I'll see you on my next video bye he toys peekaboo